Though I know some will disagree with me… If you get poked and proded enough, you get upset….
Especially if people keep telling you the same things over and over again, it gets old… Especially if it is your button… All my life people have been telling me that I don’t have a right to my feelings. Oh what you went through wasn’t bad. Or get over it…
Well you know what, What I went through wasn’t right and I didn’t deserve it. You denying it doesn’t take any of that away. It may make you feel better, but it doesn’t me! So I will continue to tell people what for until I don’t need to anymore…
I have control and the choice to not only my voice but the powerful word of NO!!!
As a survivor of sexual abuse being able to say NO is very powerful and it applies to other situations as well. Right now I need to say no, because it reminds me I have a choice. I don’t have to put up with it. Am I negative right now, probably yes.. and I am angry, hell yes. Will I always be this way NO! 
I have come full circle to the point to realize that people PROJECT. They see me being honest with my feelings and my experiences and it makes their troubles and lives TOO REAL! So they will do whatever it takes to SILENCE ME! The longer I stand up, the harder they will try to pull me down… Even though I know this, it doesn’t make it easier. It gets tiring and it gets OLD real quick…
I have been growing. Earlier I said something like “it is hard to overcome feeling worthless”. I could have said that I was worthless… That is a big step for me. One person could still see the first part as being negative. Even one person commented just get over it… Again typical response and I say FUCK THAT….You get over it! Let me handle it the best way I know how…
and here is the thing, yes it is best to move on… but that takes time… it doesn’t happen over night… and on anyone elses clock or schedule… healing takes a lot of time… it is a process. so the next time you feel the need to tell someone what they should do, look inward at your own life…. be the change you want to see…
at least I am processing my feelings, not hiding them…. i am facing them head on… sure there is a lot more I could be doing but it is all in due time…
Comments on: "Being angry is okay" (1)
Yep.. heard those same things and sometimes still do. Some days I just want to look at someone and say -” go ahead, make that statement and let’s see what happens as a result. Are you feeling lucky today?” I hear you though on this and some days I have more than enough anger to go around for everyone.
I’ve had so many just want me to get over it as well and shut up about it all. They’ve told me that hopefully one of these days I will move on from it as if it didn’t happen. I’m like – that’s what I’m doing and if you can’t handle it, than leave me alone.
As you can see.. I really connect with you on this one.